A list of Very Tall Losers

Over the past few days a video has gone viral.

A man named Chris Morgan, who’s all of 4’11” or 5’0″ tall is having a meltdown in a bagel shop. He’s complaining that women won’t date him because of his height. It’s obviously true. Women do care about height. My mother once told me that the main reason she married my father was because he was 6’2″. Well, that and the fact that she thought he looked like Johnny Ray. But if it’s any consolation to Chris Morgan there are plenty of tall losers in the world. I give you a list of them here.


Beto O’Rourke: 6’4″. Admittedly he has a hot (and very rich) wife, but he’s never going to be President.


Bill De Blasio: 6’5″. I still remember him endorsing Hillary in 2016. Nobody cared, or even noticed.


Corey Booker: 6’2″. Butt boy for big pharma, charter schools and the Israel Lobby. What’s he polling at now? 1%?


Joe Biden: 6’0″. Has to bend over when he sniffs the hair of children and small women. Totally owned by Kamala Harris in the debates. Sadly, he actually could be the next President. Well, we’ll see.

John Kerry: 6’5″. He started out well. He protested the Vietnam War. He helped expose the corruption of the Reagan administration during the Iran Contra hearings. But sadly, by 2004, when he got the Democratic nomination for President, he had turned into an utter cuck. Even though he tried to rebrand himself as a “war hero” and deny his past as an anti-war activist, he was humiliated by George W. Bush and the Swift Boat Veterans for Truth.

I have no idea how tall Bernie Sanders is but the man sticks by his anti-war principles. Yeah, he’s not that great on Israel or Venezuela, but unlike the very very tall John Kerry who completely surrendered his ideals to become President, and then lost anyway, at least he’s not a cuck.

And now for the moment short men all over the world like Chris Morgan have been waiting for.


Vladimir Putin: 5’7″. The most powerful man in the world. Lives rent free in the head of every liberal wine mom in America. Has an endless supply of good vodka and hot Russian women. If he can do it, anybody can.

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